I haven’t really said a whole lot about my 2^nd cochlear implant procedure.  I’m excited I was able to get one, grateful I had the time to take off work, and looking forward to ‘A-Day’.  But, it also hurts a little more than the last time.  Dr. Berryhill told me afterwards that it took a little longer and would hurt a little more because he had to use hand tools instead of the electronic tools he used the first time.  Apparently, the electronic tools would mess up the first implant.  The surgery itself took about 3 hours and I wasn’t ready to go home for almost an hour and a half afterwards.  The anesthesia was very hard to recover from. 

I’m doing a lot better today.  My right ear still feels like someone took a metal rod and shoved it into my ear canal.  I can feel the fluid moving around in there.  When I was discharged, the nurse wrote that I might have some “Kool-Aid colored discharge” from my ear in the first few days.  I wasn’t able to ask what flavor of Kool-Aid was going to be coming out of my ear though.   

The papers also said to “sneeze through my mouth”.

Ohhhh Kaaaay…

I haven’t learned how to do that yet. I usually sneeze through my nose.  And last, to try not to cough. Excuse me, but you gave me 3 hours of anesthesia.  I’ve got a little phlegm building up in there and need to get this loogie out NOW before I choke on it.

(Hack, spit)

However, I’ve managed to get through today without using the narcotic painkillers despite feeling like an elephant is sitting on my ear.

Charlie bought me a new pillow made from the memory foam and it feels incredible. He also got me a new heating pad, which I have yet to use thanks to COCOA, who keeps hogging it up.  I had lunch with my friend, Jennifer, from MNTC.  I got my hair trimmed by the incredibly talented, Ashley, at Ihloff Salon.

And I watched American Idol.  You have NO idea how exciting it is to be able to actually hear the difference in the bad and good singers now that I have at least 1 implant in place.  I can’t wait to hear with both implants activated!

My husband, Charlie, tells some of the funniest stories ever from his childhood or his Army days.  Even though I’ve heard it multiple times, the following story, which I call “The Popcorn Story” never fails to make me laugh. One time, I laughed so hard, I actually peed my pants. 

 Here’s the story as he told me (with some embellishments of course):

Once up on a time, a long time ago, when dinosaurs still roamed the earth, and my husband was a teenager, he had a friend named Ralph. Ralph wasn’t the smartest guy in town, but he had a nice car. One evening, he took a local girl to the drive-in movie on a date. While they were waiting for the movie to start, Ralph went to the concession stand to buy popcorn. Remember, back in those days, popcorn came in a paper box, not a cardboard tub, and the bottom of the box could be opened.

 When Ralph got back with the popcorn, he got it in his head that it would be funny to take his wee-wee out of his pants and put the popcorn box on top of it, so when he dated reached in the box for some popcorn, she’d get a “surprise”. Sure enough, when she reached in there and grabbed his pee-pee instead of popcorn, she got a surprise.

 Then Ralph got a surprise.

 She took her hand out, reached over and opened his car door, pushed him out, scooted over to the driver’s side, shut the door, started the car and drove off. Ralph was dumbfounded that she didn’t find it as funny as he did. He eventually called his dad to come pick him up at the drive-in. When his dad arrived, he wanted to know what happened to the car.

 Embarrassed to admit the truth, Ralph confessed about the trick he played on his date. As they drove home, they passed the girl’s home and there was Ralph’s car sitting in her driveway. Instead of pulling over and getting Ralph’s car for him, his dad told him he deserved what he got for such a mean trick and to teach him a lesson, he was going to let the girl keep the car and drive it for a week.

 Poor Ralph. A couple of years later, he got my husband and some other friends in trouble by telling them they could borrow the car…but that is a story for another blog.

T. Adam Geurkink, OD

For the first time in YEARS, I’ve finally found an eye doctor that takes my insurance AND offers quality, friendly service! Dr. Adam Geurkink, of Norman Eye Associates, and his staff were so nice to me and so helpful. Not once did I feel uncomfortable in their office, like I have at my previous eye doctors. Dr. Adam made sure I could understand what he was saying at all times. He actually asked me if I had any questions about my eyes. Yes, I know most of you are used to the doctor being professional like this, but my experience has not been the best when it comes to eye doctors.

 The last doctor I used (and I haven’t been back for 2 years despite desperately needing new glasses) wouldn’t talk to me at all. I mean AT ALL. He seemed uncomfortable with a hard of hearing patient.

 My eyes are doing wonderful, just getting older and now I need bifocals. Michelle helped me find a pair of glasses last night that my husband, Charlie, actually liked. Unfortunately, she had to recommend a different pair based on my prescription and the fact that I have bifocals. Then she pulled out a pair and told me I needed to find something similar to the pair she had in her hand. I tried them on and OMG they fit perfectly! I have so much trouble finding women’s glasses that actually fit. One problem: they were purple. Ugh! 

Katie found the frames listed on the computer and discovered they came in brown. Hurray! Michelle showed them to Dr. Adam and he said they would work well with the bifocals. So we ordered the new pair and they cost about the same as I’ve paid at the other doctor. I’m getting the no-line bifocals at the doctor’s recommendation and not getting the transition lenses this time. Michelle recommended anti-reflective coating instead because I find myself shading my eyes INSIDE to see people’s faces. I’m not getting them tinted at this time, but Michelle said I could add one later if I wanted.

I’m so excited! And in a couple of months, I can buy a pair of prescription sunglasses as well. 

Thank you, Dr. Adam and Staff at Norman Eye Associates, for helping me improve my ability to see the invisible.  (And I mean that literally, I’m freaking blind these days.)

First, he was told to use a specific plug and he decided he wanted to use the one under my desk, which my boss had said NOT to use. I told him this and he blew me off. And yes, I tattled on him. Damn skippy I did. I wasn’t about to have my boss fire ME because he wasn’t following the rules.

Two days later, he answers a question asked by the trainer that was directed to the class not to him. Are you kidding me? That’s one of the big no-no’s of not just interpreting, but he wouldn’t have dared to do that in a courtroom. What makes him think its ok for him to do that in my classroom?

And finally, he actually yelled at me. I was busy working and he started typing, but it wasn’t for the classroom. It was him telling me he talked to my supervisors about needing more frequent breaks. “That’s fine,” I tell him. “That’s between you and the supervisors.” He snaps at me, “Would you at least let me finish?”

Really? You’re going to yell at me when I need to be working not having conversations with you? You’re going to yell at the person who is the only reason you even have this job? And you’re a freelance who has to take what he can get? Plus you’re new in town and need to develop a good reputation, not piss off the few people that actually request CART services.

And come to find out, he’s not doing the CART correctly either. He wouldn’t put any hard returns in the narrative for easier reading. The new captionist does this plus she adds things like “speaker” and “question” so I know who is talking.

DEAF ‘TERPING FOR DEAF? HOW DOES THAT WORK?

Unbelievably, this guy also had a hearing loss and used a hearing aid. He couldn’t hear the questions from the other trainees and would get extremely agitated. He finally started asking the trainers to repeat the questions, but he would be very aggressive and demanding. Even the guy across from me could tell he was getting mad when he couldn’t hear. And get this…he actually started typing to me during a lecture that the supervisors didn’t care or understand that he couldn’t hear the questions.

I’m sorry, but hearing is a necessity for court reporting, transcribing, and CART services. And I’m sure you don’t yell at the judge to REPEAT THE QUESTION during court.

PUT YOUR OVARY AWAY, DUDE

I swear, I must be some kind of magnet for overly sensitive men. In addition to the captionist, I’ve managed to piss off someone I dated in high school. He kept saying something about an “ear dude” fixing me on my FaceBook status. My response was, “I’ll be sure to tell my female audiologist you called her a dude.” He deleted me as a friend after telling me I wasn’t very nice. Who the hell says “dude” anyway? Besides Michelle Tanner on Full House, that is.

GIRLS RULE BOYS DROOL

Two days into having a new captionist, I’m in heaven. Her equipment isn’t new and fancy like his, but I can read her screen better and can keep up and take notes much easier. I take notes while reading along because it helps me retain the information and then I have it right there for the quizzes we usually have almost immediately after the lectures.

I get along with everyone but that captionist, so I’m pretty sure it wasn’t me.

I got a tattoo Friday. It’s my first tattoo and probably my last because it hurt like a SOB. I don’t like pain. PERIOD. But to show my support for Breast Cancer awareness, the pain was worth every minute. My daughter and I both got the Breast Cancer awareness pink ribbon in honor of my Grandma Marcella (who passed away in 1981) and my Aunt Rita (who is now in remission).

Job

I was finally hired by the Disability Determination Division of Social Security and started Oct 1. Work provided me with CART (Computer Assisted Real-time Transcription) for training and it’s helping me so much. Many times, the speakers tend to wander away from the front of the room or need to demonstrate something on the computer and I can’t see them anymore. It’s a complicated situation because we have computers in front of us and until they find a place to put us in the building, we’ll be doing our actual work in the training room.

Disclaimer: NO I cannot look up your case on my work computer! We are only allowed to look up the cases we are assigned. And yes, they do keep tabs on where we’ve been in the computer system.

Cochlear Implant

As part of my new job, I recently learned that Cochlear Implant recipients are considered disabled by Social Security for a period of one year following the implantation just like any other organ transplant. I had NO idea and this is a fairly new change. It was effective Aug. 2, 2010.

I tried using an ALD (Assistive Listening Device) during training, but the processor doesn’t seem compatible with the ALD. I used one when I had a hearing aid and thought it would help to use it in training, but the ticking noise was overwhelming and I can’t use it. I’m going to be looking into this over the next few weeks and have my audiologist recommend some products.

Cooking

Now that I’m working full-time, Charlie is taking a more active role in meal preparation. At least he’s making sure the kitchen is clean and helping me choose what to cook. We discovered McCormick’s Recipe Inspirations recently. I absolutely love the Sage Porkchops and Apples and the Rosemary Chicken and Potatoes. Each one has a reusable recipe card so all I have to do is stock up on the spices in the future. This week we’re going to try the Garlic Lime Chicken Fajitas and the Spanish Chicken Skillet.

Advanced TV

Cox finally upgraded OKC to Advanced TV and I love it! I’ve been able to catch up on my shows and even watch a few shows I’d never seen before. We can only record 2 shows at a time. Plus now we can search by typing in the name of the show instead of having to SCROLL SCROLL SCROLL through the listings.

What’s up with Kim Z saying “That’s Retarded!” to tell someone she likes their outfit?  When did this become acceptable? 

NeNe and Dwight

Maybe Dwight screwed up and maybe he didn’t. Maybe he overstepped the boundaries of the friendship. But where does she get off confronting him at a public event instead of calling him up on the phone and asking him to sit down with her at her home and talking about the issue? If I have a problem with someone, I don’t meet them in a public restaurant or whatever and talk. Even if I could hear better, I wouldn’t do that because privacy is a requirement for having a real conversation to resolve a dispute. At least in this episode, they got together in a private room at the restaurant owned by Cynthia’s boyfriend.

NeNe and Bryson

As I watched NeNe go off on Bryson about how lenient she’s been with him, I could see myself saying the same thing. I have an 18 year-old daughter who still lives with us. I’m so grateful she at least works a part-time for the moment despite on-going health issues related to the car wreck she was in last October. I’m so thankful the Health Care Reform Act passed because my daughter can stay on my insurance until she’s 26 – and not have to be enrolled in school full-time. As much as she wants to go to school, she may have to do part of her classes online because her back hurts her all the time. The new medication makes her excessively tired. But we had a comparable moment when we asked her to have her guests leave at 2 am. I basically told her, “You’re not my roommate, you’re my daughter.” If she pays 1/3 of the bills and for her car, we’ll consider her a roommate.

Kim Z and Kandi

I was glad to see that someone in this world doesn’t allow business to get in the way of friendship. Kudos to Kandi! She admitted to making a mistake by not having a standard agreement put in writing regarding royalties of Kim’s “Tardy for the Party” song. She’ll know better next time she works with Kim Z. According to her  BravoTV.com blog, Kandi and Kim Z had an agreement that shared a portion of the royalties with the original author of the song as well as one of Kim’s daughters.

Phaedra and NeNe

I feel like I’ve gotten lost somewhere along the way…why does NeNe hate Phaedra so much? Obviously they know each other somehow; but, according to NeNe, not when they were children living in the same town.

Phaedra and Apollo

I honestly don’t know what to think about Phaedra, an attorney, being married to a convicted felon. You’d think she could do better than that, right? Does she have self-esteem issues? Her blog reads like a legal brief and mentions that Malcom X was a felon. Malcom X didn’t marry his attorney, though.

I almost didn’t leave the house this morning because I was busy putting my head between my legs trying to overcome the nausea. But when I got home a couple of hours later, the nausea was gone. On the way home, we stopped by Walgreens and I walked over to the cosmetics area where two salespeople were talking and turned off my hearing aid. From 10 feet away, I was able to pick up their voices.

No, the sounds don’t sound right yet. Speech doesn’t sound like speech. It still sounds like “bells and whistles”. But the important thing is that I’m actually hearing the sounds. Kela told me it was more important to find a comfort zone right now than to try to understand the sounds. I can tell the difference between male and female voices. The sounds aren’t as loud as they were with my hearing aid, but if the processor is set any louder than now, I get sick to my stomach.

And because of these minor issues, I don’t feel like I’m ready to go back to work. Charlie and I both think the best thing I can do is take the summer off and try for admission to OU Graduate School next January.

Another doctor visit this afternoon, this time to make sure my incision is healing properly. I bought a new tube of Aloe Vera that doesn’t contain lidocaine or menthol. My incision feels very dry, almost like stitches are popping out of it.

Bactrim

I’m not in a good place right now. Mostly because I’m having some side effects as a result of taking Bactrim and to top it off, the noises from the implant are making me nauseous.  I need to get out but I’m not supposed to be in the sun while on Bactrim, so going for a walk or to the park during the day isn’t really an option.  Neither is playing in the garden and I need to plant the sweet potatoes I bought last week. 

My sweet potato plants

I’ve never planted sweet potatoes before.  Someone suggested I use sweet potato vines as a ground cover in an area where the dogs have ruined the yard.  I think the vines would be a good idea, especially if I get some fresh sweet potatoes at the end of the summer. Unfortunately, mice like them too.  UGH.  We always get mice but we also have 4 cats to keep them under control.

Miss Kitty

Speaking of cats…Lil Miss Bitchy Kitty found herself stuck outside in the thunderstorm last night.  When Charlie opened the front door to watch the storm, Miss Kitty was meowing pitifully begging to come in the house.  I guess she didn’t want to go all the way around to the side of the house to use the dog door.  As hard as that rain was coming down, I probably would have sat on the porch and cried my eyes out too.

I want to cry now because the implant is working as well as I’d hoped.  But, both the doctor and the audiologist told me I need to give it time. Like six months to a year for it to work.  I also need to start auditory therapy soon, but we aren’t sure if the insurance will cover the service.  One thing my audiologist suggested was reading out loud.  I also have a computer program I can use.  I need either a new FM loop because mine has disappeared or the audio cord that fits directly into the processor so the sound will go directly into my processor and eliminate the background noise.  I looked it up online and the Nucleus cord costs $150 for mono $200 for stereo. 

HOLY CRAP!  We’re not rich people you know.  We’re living off of Charlie’s disability right now, which is more than enough, but we also need to save for a “rainy day” in case we need major house repairs.  What am I talking about? We DO need some major home repairs.  And the contractor that remodeled the kitchen for Charlie’s ex-wife was a complete idiot.  The kitchen needs to be remodeled to fix what the remodeler messed up.  Does that make sense? 

I do have some good news, so this blog is not just another bitchfest.  Meagan finally found a summer job, working at a tanning salon nearby.  I’m so happy I could BURST!  Now she will stay busy, earn her own money, and get some experience so she can get a decent work history.

Now, if only I could find a position, even an unpaid internship…

Bookmark me at http://chattycathy867.blogspot.com/

Cathy and Charlie

As I sit here watching the OKC Great Flood of 2010 on the news, I’m thinking about what to write for a blog about meeting my husband Charlie and our first date to post on McLinky Monday.  (Has anyone else ever noticed how all these major storms occur on Mondays?)

In April 2004, I had been divorced about 6 months after a two-year separation that involved an ugly custody battle.  The kids and I lived in a small all-bills paid apartment in downtown Tulsa near the Arkansas River so I would be close to work in case the car broke down and I could walk to work.

I spent a lot of time playing on the computer and typing in an AOL chatroom because I was broke, didn’t have any friends, and had no idea how to meet people.  Plus, for someone with my type of hearing loss, a chatroom was a great way to keep up with a conversation. 

One day, I noticed a new name in my regular chatroom and the posts were cracking me up.  I hadn’t laughed in a long time like I did when I talked to “Wranglrm”.  Over the next six weeks, we would chat in the room and occasionally in a private message.  He was never inappropriate, but would use the private message to tell me more about himself and his life.  He was unhappily married at the time and would occasionally dump on me about his marital problems.  My response to everything was, “You need to sit down and talk to your wife about what you’ve told me.”  At the time, she was visiting her mother in Georgia, who was recuperating from surgery.

After six weeks of chatting, he told me he would like to visit Tulsa because he’d never been there before. I suggested we meet up and attend Mayfest.  I’d never even seen a picture of him before, so it probably wasn’t the smartest move on my part to meet some strange man, but several people I knew in person had met him before and said he was ok.  (We’re not even going to get into the part that he was married to someone else at the time…yet.)  Charlie had admitted to me he was 21 years older than me (old enough to be my daddy.)  What he didn’t tell me was that he LOOKED old enough to be my daddy.  So, I opened the door to this balding, grey haired little man who oddly enough, reminded me of Ernest P. Worrell from the Braum’s commercials.

My babysitter was running late, so he sat on my love seat while my daughter and I sat on the couch and watched Law & Order together.  Meagan and I looked over and noticed that Charlie was SOUND ASLEEP on my love seat and started giggling.  The poor guy had worked a full eight-hour shift at the post office in OKC and then drove 2 hours to my place after work.  He was pooped. 

When the babysitter arrived, Charlie and I left for Mayfest and walked around for a little while looking at the booths.  Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed someone we knew from the chatroom and pointed them out to him, while we stayed out of their line of sight.  (Ok, I admit it. We HID so they wouldn’t see us and we could kind of spy on them.  And I was laughing because this girl was supposed to be “engaged” to a guy Charlie knew in OKC, but she was at Mayfest with her husband.)

After spying on mutual acquaintances walking around Mayfest for about an hour or so, we decided to find something to eat and stopped by Bourbon Street on 15^th.  I love to eat and by then I was STARVING.  Remember, I was a poor, broke-ass single mother and didn’t get to go out to eat at nice restaurants sans children too often.  I ordered the Chicken Alfredo and must have eaten at least half of it in between laughing my ass off while Charlie told me stories about his life.  Charlie took me home at 11:00 and I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek then went inside while he headed back to OKC. 

I couldn’t believe how much fun I had hanging out with some guy 20 years older than me.  And he was a perfect gentleman too, unlike the men my age who were all trying to jump in bed with me on the first date.  I felt bad for him because he was in a bad situation with his marriage.  Over the next few months, I encouraged him to be honest with his wife and seek counseling.  I dated other men during that time, but I never had as much fun with them as I had with Charlie. 

Charlie filed for divorce that fall and it was finalized at the end of May 2005, a year after we met in person.  We were married June 6, 2005 in Fort Smith, AR.  We had a long-distance relationship for the previous six months and were tired of not being together.  We enjoyed each other’s company and we had been best of friends for the past year too.

So that’s the story of “how I met my husband”.  It wasn’t the best of situations, and several people we knew called me a gold-digging home wrecker because we married so quickly after his divorce was finalized.  But, five years later, we are still together and still enjoying being a family.